Relationships can be complicated for some people and simple for others. There is no ideal algorithm to make your relationship work longer, it all depends on the type of relationship and criteria of both of your personalities. However, the ideal relationship isn't as we mostly imagine as a flawless one. A successful long lasting relationships is usually far away from perfection and it depends mainly on the ability of both partners to let go and adapt to each other's habits and personalities.
Despite the latter fact, there are common key factors that would make your relationship work for a longer period of time or may even last for your whole life. We have summarized these criteria in the following 7 behaviors that will help your relationship last long with the ones you love.
No wonder if love comes in the first place as a key factor and behavior for any long lasting relationship. I can hear you say now: Why would I become in a relationship with ones I don't love?
The answer is: it happens and it happens a lot too. Many couples are bound with many factors and elements other than true love, for example:
- Money (some women or even men get attracted to rich partners)
- Success (who wouldn't date a famous superstar but does it work always?)
- The need to belong (when it is all you want is to belong to someone else)
- And finally when you have no better alternatives (some relationships are based on mutual agreement that we have no better deal and that we can't find - or afford - a better soul mate).
All these previous factors could interfere with your perception of love which will then be mistaken for other emotions like gratitude or comfort. This is not love and true love should be based on mutual acceptance and willingness to accept the flaws and demerits of your partner not only the advantages you see in this relationship, so the question you need to ask yourself now is: Will you still love your soul mate if the things you loved them for vanished?.
Another fundamental key behavior in any successful relationship is the mutual ability for each partner to apologize for the wrong things they do. Sometimes apology is needed too when you don't do anything wrong at all but due to lack of appropriate explanation for some situations that are not clear for the other partner.
Apology is not easy at all and not all people are gifted with the ability to apologize or accept their own flaws and then your partner won't accept them either. The best apology for anything wrong is not doing it again, so basically apology requires some personality and behavior modifications which might be hard for some people and the ability to direct the right message with the right behavior to your partner.
You need to learn how to let go before starting a long term relationship with anybody. Your partner will make mistakes and will fail you and so you will do. If they apologize then and try to change, you have to help them by letting go and forgiving.
Strong memory is bad for relationships and what I mean by strong memory is the the long lasting effects of certain bad events or memories related to the other partner. If you keep your grudges and fail to let go or forgive, you better end this relationship as fast as you can because you are not fit for this relationship and there is nothing wrong about it, you can then have a chance for a more suitable relationship with someone else and so your partner rather than keeping a sick relationship full of grudges and bad memories.
Any long lasting relationship should be based on mutual respect and dignity for each partner. If you fail to respect your partner or the otherwise happens as if your partner is not paying you much respect, this is a serious sign for sooner or later break up. But you don't force yourself on respecting someone you don't really respect as this would be a bigger mistake which leads to a heart break eventually. Better to choose someone you pay respect to and get respect in return.
Disrespect isn't just about words, it can show up with lack of proper or gentle attitude in public or even cheating on your partner with someone else. If you cheat on your partner, you are buying a cheap good at a very expensive price so you better break up before trying to cheat on your partner.
As much is it looks weird to add finance and money to this list but this is a fact we can't ignore especially when you live in an eastern country where men and only men are responsible for all financial issues like having an appropriate place to live in and bringing food to the table. It is ugly to say that I know but money is a fact we can't ignore in any relationship as you need to work hard to afford at least the basic needs for your relationship. Even in western countries, you will need a financial plan for having a proper house and raising kids. You may fall into a relationship with someone from a different socioeconomic level and it looks great for a romantic movie where love breaks all the boundaries but then you will have to fight all these boundaries and you will mostly fail in real life unlike movies which end up happily.
Kids are the real joy of life and they will make your relationship stronger because now you have too much in common with your partner. Raising kids might be hard but they will make your life happier for sure especially when they grow up and then you will feel the gratitude for your partner who gave you these beautiful little creatures. The more you delay having kids the more likely to break up with your partner.
This is a major difference between eastern and western countries as most of relationships in eastern countries start with marriage but in western ones marriage is unlikely to start with and it comes as a final step. Marriage is the ultimate bond between any partners and by signing this contract you show the world that you are willing to spend your whole life with your partner. Marriage is a very strong bond and I personally recommend any couple to show honest and true love by marriage.
There are many other behaviors that are fundamental for any relationship and they differ according to cultural differences but these ones on this list are the most common in all communities. Relationships aren't as easy as love and they need daily behaviors and attitudes to keep the flame going.
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